Burnin’ down the house…or hostel
Yes…the title is literal! A few weeks ago I went to make some rice in the hostel kitchen…and well to make a long story short because my space bar is not working well….it resulted in a huge gas fire!
The girls had left the flame on the gas stove, like they always do, so I just put my pot of water on. I turned it up a bit, and then suddenly flames came out of everywhere, even the knob that I was turning. My first reaction was to turn off the knob, but I would have had to reach into the flames. There was another girl in the kitchen and so she and I just backed away from the stove. I figured that the girls would know what to do, since they live here and always deal with gas stoves,but I was wrong. They kept telling me to just wait cause “uncle” (one of the older guards) was coming and he would fix the problem. Well first Uncle had to get permission to come into the hostel,cause no men are allowed, and when he saw the blaze, which was about four feet high and now working it’s way across the kitche, he said, “Oho!” and didn’t know what to do. One of the girls rolled in an old fire extinguisher which I had no idea how to use and figured was five or ten years out of date. Uncle looked at me and said, “yih pani hai?” while pointing at the fire extinguisher. “This is water?” I said, “Nahin, yih chemical hai.”
It was at this point I realized nobody knew any better than I did what to do so with a Punjabi-English mix of instructions myself and the other girl who had been in the kitchen took charge. She went outside and turned off the gas supply. At this point, all the hoses connecting hte gas had melted and the gas was even burning inside the wall. I could smell the gas filling the kitchen, which is quite large, and it was difficult to breathe or keep my eyes open. I got a pail of water and directed Uncle to fill up a bucket with dirt to throw on the blaze first. We had had monsoon rains that afternoon, so we ended up with a few buckets of mud. Then Uncle and I, along with one other girl, went towards the blaze slinging mud at it as if it were our opponent. Uncle was desperately trying to be “the man” although he’s a bit older so it would have been better if we girls had just handled it.He drenched a thick rug with water and threw it on the gas stove,which Iwasn’t sure was the best idea but at least we’d already covered it in mud and gotten rid of most of the flame. The other girl and I concentrated on throwing mud into the pipes burning inside the wall in order to extinguish it for good. There were still some flames creeping out from under the stove,when finally a man who knew how to use the ancient fire extinguishers arrived. He put out the blaze once and for all. Whew.
Afterwards the crowd was joking about “michelle’s sunday night special,” which now included charred mushrooms, onions, melted plastic and a whole lot of ashes!
The good thing is, the fire incident led to the purchasing of new stoves and the installment of safer metal piping instead of rubber hoses, which had led to my dinner becoming a blaze…
You just might miss it…
Stories such as the following show up EVERY day in the local newspaper (www.dawn.com). These stories don’t ever make the front page and remain small blurbs on the inside of the paper. I’m also wondering, who is this dubious “correspondent” with no name….seems like he or she always comes across that most gory stories.
Woman, daughter slain
By Our Correspondent (DAWN)
JHANG, July 10: A man stabbed to death his wife and mother-in-law after his reconciliation bid with his estranged wife failed in Malhoona village, some 20kms from here on Sunday. Reports reaching here said that accused Qaiser had contracted marriage with Surraya Bibi of the same village some two years back.A couple of months ago, Surraya Bibi shifted to her parents’ after quarrelling with her husband.The accused tried to bring back his estranged wife, but to no avail. In a last ditch attempt of reconciliation, he again went to his in-laws on Sunday. During a squabble on Sunday, he fell into a rage when his mother-in-law and wife refused to accede to his request. He took out a knife and stabbed to death both of them on the spot.
Expats looted
By Our Correspondent
GUJRANWALA, July 10: Dacoits looted houses of four expatriate brothers, a landlord and killed him on resistance in two strikes in and around the city here on Monday. Reports said seven robbers forced their entry into the house of Boota, Allah Ditta, Muhammad Yousaf and Abdul Ghafoor on Kot Noora Road in Ghakkhar Town by scaling the boundary wall. They held hostage women, children and made off with Rs200,000, gold jewellery worth Rs400,000, mobile phones and other valuables.The four brothers were settled in Italy since long while their father was present in the house along with his daughters-in-law and their children.In another incident, four bandits entered the house of landlord Muhammad Anwar at Behlool Chak, took away cash and gold ornaments worth Rs100,000 and shot him dead on offering resistance.
Heatwave claims four lives
By Our Correspondent
DERA ISMAIL KHAN, July 10: Four people were killed and more than 20 fainted on Sunday owing to scorching heat and humidity which gripped Dera Ismail Khan. A farmer Musa was fell unconscious when he was cutting grass in village Kathgarh. He later lost his life in the field due to suffocation. Another farmer died during tilling his filed in Guldani North village.Yark police mobile found a body near a tower of Telenor cellular company. A farmer died while grazing his sheep herd in Harwakai area of the district.Meanwhile, the frequent power breakdowns have caused unrest among the people of the district.
Runaway Returned
Reaching Lahore again, they went straight to the boys’ family. His older brother, who had been put in jail until his return, was released. The boys’ family was now afraid to return Saima to her parents. Her own family would be likely to beat her or even murder her for the shame she would bring her family for this escapade. She spent two days at the boys’ house, being told continuously that if she went home her parents would surely murder her. The boys’ family tried to convince her to stay with them for the sake of her own personal safety.
What Happened to Michelle?
(I had showed them my multi-purpose tool, including a small blunt knife, a few days earlier in response to a question about knife vocabulary. I joked that it was my defence weapon against sketchy men on buses)
Funny Response – “I don’t think she has the guts to kill anyone.”
Me – “Yeah I’m not sure if I do either.”
Group #3 – Most Ridiculous
“It was wicked hot and Michelle had trouble sleeping the night before. When she woke up, she realized that due to the heat she had pimples all over her face. She looked in her mirror and saw the pimples. She was upset and decided she could not go to teach class with this complexion. She went straight to the parlour to have her face fixed. It took two hours, and by the time she was looking beautiful enough for class, we had already left.”
Group #4 – Most Hilarious (this one is of course the boys)
“Michelle’s cousin was interested to propose to her. He thought that she was so beautiful that he must marry her. He came all the way to Pakistan, but unfortunately he went to the wrong city. He landed in Islamabad and not Lahore. This man was, Tom Cruise. Michelle found out he was waiting for her in the capital and asked Mr. Tahir to go to him. Now we have a drama to show what happened.”
Mr. Tahir – Michelle how are you?Michelle – I’m good. I have a favor to ask you.
Mr. Tahir – No problem, just ask me and we’ll see what we can do.
Michelle – You see I have to go to Islamabad. One of my friends is waiting for me there.
Mr. Tahir – Well, who will take your class? I don’t know if this is a good idea.
Michelle – Oh please let me go. I really need to meet with this friend.
Mr. Tahir – Ok, you can go.
Michelle – Thanks so much. Bye Bye. (Waving girlishly)
(In Islamabad Tom Cruise paces anxiously in Jinnah Gardens, a popular meeting places for couples)
Tom Cruise – (pacing and talking on the cell phone)
Michelle – (walking into garden) Hello. I am here. How are you?
Michelle – I had to come from Lahore. You know it’s five hours away.
Tom Cruise – Nevermind. You are so beautiful. I want to ask you to marry me…
the LIP boys
I’m currently teaching a program called LIP, Language Improvement Program, to 37 students. Most students are currently teachers in government English medium schools, but I also have four guys in the class. Two are in the army and two are currently studying for their Masters. It’s an interesting dynamic with 33 girls and only 4 guys, but the guys have bonded together and help make the class fun….although sometimes at the teacher’s expense!
A quote from class:
Ms. Michelle (me) – “Okay so who decided they wouldn’t want to study in Australia?”
(All four boys and two girls raise their hands. I call on the girls first. )
“Because why study in Australia when I can study English here?”
“Well, why go to Australia? I’d rather go to Canada where my sister lives.”
And the boys, “We don’t want to go to Australia ’cause we have a pretty teacher from America right here!”
Everyone laughs. The boys proudly smile at their response. I laugh, most likely turn a little bit red at embarrassment, and say “Okay, on the next question….”
During our game day last friday, one of the boys proved to be a real smooth talker. We were playing a game from “Whose Line Is it Anyway?” where there are three guests with interesting identities or strange problems. The “host” of the party needs to guess what the guests are struggling with. We had one girl who thought she was a fish outta water, an elderly woman on the verge of death, and a supermodel. All the girls were great actresses, I was quite impressed! The supermodel girl walked in fixing her hair and kept talking to Ejaz, the host, about how she wanted to become more and more beautiful and famous. He assured her, “What are you talking about? You are already the most beautfil girl in the world? There is nothing you can do to become more beautiful. Does anyone have a mirror?” The class roared in laughter.
Although my students are all out of college and at least in their twenties, it’s like teaching 7th graders when it comes to boy-girl relations. The boys always sit in the corner by themselves, and anytime anyone mentions the opposite sex, marriage, or anything of that sort, the class erupts into giggles. The boys have a good time with this, although they can get embarrassed as well. Today we were talking of our “future plans,” and the boys were embarrassed to say that they hoped to get married. Only one of them, who said he planned to do a Masters and establish his own business first, would admit he wanted to get married and have children in the future. This put all the girls laughing and refusing to look him in the eyes in case he might be interested in them. This dynamic is amusing for the foreign teacher, but many times I have to steer clear of topics that I would easily be able to use in the American classroom. Also, many times I try to avoid topics on dating and the like, the students are so preoccupied thinking about it that every topic comes back to the opposite sex anyways. In order to avoid any proposals myself, I’ve taken to telling everyone in this country that I’m already engaged. This has saved me from being proposed to by uncles, men already with a few wives, strange boys who pay someone for my number, and having my marriage arranged by friends to their son, grandson, nephew or whoever. Upon meeting me everyone always asks, “Ap shadi hai?” are you married? It is crazy for them to think of a 23 year old girl travelling the world, not living in her parents house, and not yet being married with a few kids! One of my friends is a 34 year old single guy, he gets even more grief than I do for not being married yet. Students can barely carry on with their lessons because they are all dying to ask him why he has not taken one, two, or four wives yet. Oh the amusement that gender segregation brings to the co-ed classroom. 🙂
Runaway
Late last week a friend of mine called me, apologizing for not being
in touch. He’d been helping me with my visa process, and as the
current one runs out on July 15th he is accustomed to giving me daily
updated on the extension process and letting me know what I need to do next. I hadn’t heard from him in three or four days and there was a good reason why.
One of his friend’s daughter’s had run away and gotten married. Her
family is extremely conservation and despite wearing full burka (the
black, tent-like get up) and being kept in purdah (seclusion from
males other than family members) somehow she managed to meet a guy and decided to run off with him. One of my friends told me she met her husband when he dialed a wrong number and ended up with her at the other end. He kept calling her back, and she was “fascinated with his voice.” They pursued their romance solely on the telephone, without meeting, for over a year, until she finally snuck out to meet him in person. Two years after that her parents finally gave in to letting her marry him, as he was of a lower caste. It’s possible that the same sort of situation may have happened with the runaway girl.
Two days after their marriage, signed in the mosque and everything,
the girl had moved in with the boys’ family and refused to come home
at her parents’ request. She said she was happier there and with her
new husband she would remain. You might be thinking, good for her,
she’s escaped her seclusion and made a choice on her own, but the
problem here is not just that the girl ran away and eloped, but the
fact that she is only fourteen years old. She can’t sign a legal
marriage contract (nikka) without her parents’ consent.
This then makes her marriage eligible to be tried against the Hudood
ordinances, which would leave both her and her husband charged with
adultery: sex outside marriage. This is punishable by the death
sentence, if enraged and dishonored family members don’t murder the
guilty parties previous. There is such a strong concept of family
honor and shame based around women, that fathers or brothers have been known to brutally kill their own daughters and sisters in situations like these. If the girl has been married illegally, and the marriage consummated, or the girl has even been touched by the man, she is considered as spoiled. Damaged goods. The prospects of her family marrying her off are slim, unless she is attractive and they can put up a sizeable dowry. Her action ruins the reputation of the entire family, and sometimes people see the only way of preserving their honor to be killing the culprit, usually the girl. Thankfully, in this family the parents fought hard to get their daughter back and as far as I know are open minded enough to allow her to live and carry on with her studies.
Every day I read in the newspaper here about strange murders and honor killings. Last week I read about a man who suspected his wife of having an affair with her cousin. He not only killed her but also her aunt and one of her friends in a fit of rage. He had no proof, just a nagging suspicion. Men like this are unlikely to be arrested and tried, for the mullahs support their actions against their “shameful” wives.
14 years old, running away to a new life. Sick of the burka. Sick of seclusion. Ready to find out about the world of boys and men. Running away and getting married. 14 years old.
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